A truck driver sees a girl about to jump of a bridge so he stops “What are you doing?” he says. “I’m trying to commit suicide” she says. “well before you jump give me a blowjob” the truck driver says. So she does. After she has finished the truck driver says “Wow that’s a wasted talent, why are you committing suicide?” She replies “Cause my parents don’t like me dressing up like a girl”

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John Wayne, Paul Newman and Clint Eastwood were sat in the jungle discussing who was the hardest.

Eastwood says “I killed a bear with my bare hands”

Newman says “I wrestled two adult crocodiles to their death”

John Wayne just sat there saying nothing, poking the fire with his dick.